It’s been two months since a certain person promised he’d pay me and hasn’t fulfilled his obligations. I am sad and disappointed. Bully that. However, I have learnt something new today. I’m not firm, precise and I don’t make myself clear. Ouch! Yeah. But it’s true. Just a month ago, I agreed to give away my book to someone who was supposed to pay. She made some flimsy excuse and I shrugged and went home. Suffering, angry and calling her a bully. I should have taken the book with me but I didn’t, so that’s my fault. My consolation you ask? I kept saying at least the book will be seen by new people, other people. But what’s the point of that if I don’t get what I intended. So now, I’ve decided to draw my lines.
In my work, my relationships, I compromise a lot to my own detriment, I tell you. I always say I’m being generous. Reassure myself of the greater good. Well, the greater good isn’t great if I’m ending up sad, hurt, in pain and hoping things were different. This is a crucial change I need to make in this new journey of mine since I’m starting over.
Lines; are you drawing yours?
I don’t know what’s going in your life right now but I need to remind you the importance of being firm in what you want. There’s a common misconception that people who take their stand aren’t agreeable, don’t like getting along with others and are very problematic. Maybe so, but you know what? They get exactly what they want. They lead lives they want, make relationships that are mutually beneficial to them and take vacations they deserve.
Speak up. Talk. Air out your grievances. Tell them your conditions. But most importantly follow through. Because if you don’t stick by the same rules you demand of others, that’s the end of it. There’s your loophole and their leverage. This applies across your life, among your friends, your significant other, your job, your neighbors everything, everything, everything.
Draw the lines around your life of what falls in and what doesn’t. Do away with what isn’t inside your circle. Be excellent in all you do from your house chores, duties, to your contracts and jobs.
It is the road to the kind of life you live.