My moment of pleasure
For a second or a year
Leads me back again
Searching
Needing
Wanting
And it's in this imperfection, I find my peace
Knowing that nothing in this earth
Can fill me
To my heart's content
This deep longing
Caused by your absence
Aches my heart
And festers
Into a full-blown pain
With no remedy
I'm a ball of curves
Praying to be straightened
It's not hate, I run away from
Or sadness that I shudder to think about
It's not cruelty or envy or anger
All these I know
It's kindness that I check out twice
Generosity, that I doubt
It's forgiveness that puzzles
Contentment, that I don't understand
Hold me now
Don't let me fall over
This edge
Pull me back
Don't let me sink deeper
Tis hole
For I am weak and weary
And this life
Is wahsing me away
So much beauty
Remains in us
Stuck
Because we think it's not time yet
That the world, the people, the place
Are not ready yet
While time passes through is
Washing away that beauty slowly
Until we can't find it in us anymore
There's no life we make,
Only bring
No life we take
Only lose
For we create no life
We're merely conduits
This life isn't ours
We didn't ask for it
Can't give it back
It just is
Wounds stay open
Some of them anyway
And I keep bleeding
But my life refuses to run out
Cause of you
I douse my truth
Hide myself and
Cover my heart
Afraid you'll see me
And know my thoughts
And find
The strangeness that lies therein
I'm in the sad zone, they say
Where the words don't rhyme
And music dies
The mad zone, I'm told
Where all's off tune
And life' in ruin
And a heaviness devours the land
Burning
Turning
My true colours, dark
I put my heart into it
Had my hands digging
Myself kneeling
But the seed I planted
Grew and withered
And I learned, that sometimes
The work of my hands
Can be a sore in my mind
Break me out of myself
I'm drowning
My mind won't keep still
And my heart wighs a ton
And my eyes are pouring like the rain
Break me out of myself
I'm losing it
My strength is drained
And my legs won't move forward
And my will to love escapes me
I've been lost so many times
I know the way around nowhere
All parts of myself
Lined up
And I couldn't pick one
I'm still unbale
To reconcile
These pieces into me
Still praying
To be at peace
With all slices of myself
How do I mend fences that keep falling in my own land
How do I fix bridges that get broken after each repair
Don't ask for Truth
Won't handle it
Just accuse me of lying
Can't offer more apologies
Don't ask for Truth
I can't find it
I'm lost in such tragedy
Doing my best to hide it
