Improvement, Today

Say No

Say no; the age old advice. ‘Don’t bite off more than you can chew’, ‘Don’t commit to something you know you can’t see through’. ‘Don’t say you’ll show up and you know you won’t be available that day’. We’re told over and over again but we don’t listen. Things may change, who are we to predict the future? This happens to the young fiancee who wishes she had backed out of the proposal and now walking down the altar wishing none of this was happening. To the new office assistant who agreed to complete all her colleagues’ assignment now wondering how he’s going to apologize to each of them. Say no, say no when you know, because you know you’re not ready, you’re not capable, you’re not available and it’ll come back to you as the promise breaker, the non-committer the one whose word is not be trusted.

No, may be the only answer

We’re oh so afraid to be seen as the only one who’ll disagree. The one who isn’t like the rest. However at the end of the day, we suffer on our own by putting ourselves in those positions. It’s seems hard to say no sometimes. Nevertheless at those times is the right thing and the only way to answer. Situations we are aware we are not able to complete or take part in are best dealt with by saying no at the moment of inquiry. It’s difficult but necessary. In order to avoid excuses and begging forgiveness later, it is prudent to reject. To refuse the proposal if you know for sure there’s no way you’ll be able to honour it.

I have found myself in such predicaments a number of times. Instead of learning from my mistakes and putting into use my acquired knowledge, I entrapped myself into agreeing to something I knew I wouldn’t be able to fulfill. The stupidity dawns on me in my moment of reckoning. I wish I’d have declined the request from the start. I used to feel that I shouldn’t disappoint my inquirers or I needed to be perceived as someone who’s helps everyone and shows up every time. However, no one person can be like this. I soon discovered that I was spreading myself too thin and worsening my relationships instead of building them up.

Learn to say no

So I learn to say no. I don’t always do this but when I’m sure I’ll only be making my life hard by approving an invitation I know I won’t complete, I do so. It’s not a crime to do so; it is also as good an answer to a question. Sometimes, you might be capable but because of your own personal reasons not want to take part in a particular activity; say no. Teach yourself to say no; it might just be the answer to a large number of your problems.

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